But What Does it MEAN!

I got into Naropa University's Jack Kerouac School of Disembodied Poetics. This is an MFA dream come true. I started dreaming about going there as a junior in high school when Ginsberg was still alive and active with the school.

But, what am I supposed to do?

We had decided I was staying here to go to EWU since Naropa was a last minute "I'll never get in" panic plan. I have been exchanging emails with the EWU MFA department. This has been are very positive aspect.

One big problem: Financial Aid is a big deal right now for Universities, hence, they are taking a bit longer than usual putting these aid packages together, awarding Teaching Assistantships, etc. EWU did say I was getting a $500 scholarship, which, while not much, is a good chunk of the in-state tuition. EWU also has a solid teacher training base, which is a huge selling point.

So, I got into the Beatnik school. I love all things related to this movement. But, how do I really know I will like it? I would have to fly down there and experience the environment (Boulder, workshop process, meet professors). That seems like the only real way to make a decision. I can't move and uproot my whole life (Husband's State job, house that we own, child in third grade, family within an hour away, health insurance, dental, eye care, etc) on a whim. It is a big risk. One that cannot be made on one's passionate obsessions and drives to be counterculture alone.

I am very thankful for all of my professors and their input as I would hate to let them down with a wrong decision. I horribly want to make them proud.

But you can't have everything, can you?